Forgive, But Don’t Forget

Forgiveness is a place in our hearts where we find peace within ourselves after something painful has happened to us, usually, because someone else has made a bad decision. When we are able to let something go that has taken up negative emotional energy, we feel lighter and Divine Love can flow much more freely within us. Forgiveness can be instant or it can be a process that requires many layers of healing. When we feel someone has harmed us, it is normal if the initial emotions that we feel are anger, resentment, and hurt. But then, we need to initiate a Spiritual journey in order to keep processing our feelings so that we do not get stuck in a negative cycle that stifles us or dims the light within us. The flow of love within us is essential for a healthy body and mind. 

 Sometimes, there are things in life that happen that are unforgivable. For many people, the message received throughout our lives was that we should “Forgive and Forget”. However, there are many instances where I disagree. I often have discussions with people who have been plagued with negative emotions for years because they believe if they feel forgiveness, they are saying that what happened was okay. A wise friend once told me that we can forgive without condoning. So, we can release the negative emotions that are keeping us stuck, but we never have to say that what was done was okay, or even could or should be forgotten. I even think there are times when NOT forgetting is the right thing to do so we do not continue to let someone in over and over to keep hurting us. I do not believe we are being “Godly” but just wiping bad things away and not protecting ourselves from people who can not love us the way we deserve to be loved. There are times when something has happened or been done to us that can’t be forgotten or made okay with the words “I’m sorry”. Worse yet, sometimes we never hear those words but are left to try to get past something that has stifled us with negative emotions for far too long. Sometimes, we blame ourselves for something terrible that has happened, and who we can’t forgive is ourselves.

 Because we learn and grow from our life experiences, especially, it seems, from those that are the most painful to us, when something has happened that wounds us deeply, it can become a part of us in good and bad ways. It is important that we consider what we have learned from the experience and recognize how it may have changed us. I know it can be a challenge to see any positive in it, but hopefully, through the process of forgiveness, we can get to the moment where we understand how something terrible also brought something good. 

Try to keep in mind that we learn from our mistakes and we can learn from the mistakes of others. Know that we do not have to forget something horrible that was done to us, and we definitely do NOT have to say it was okay. But through our Spiritual energy of Love, we can regain the inner balance that maintains physical and emotional well-being. Know that we are all capable of forgiveness so that our light can shine from the place deep within us.

Action Item: Take some time now to reflect on those things in your life that need to find their way to forgiveness. Get out your journal and start with yourself. Ask yourself what is standing in the way of you finding peace and healing. Explore if you can identify something, anything good that came from it, or led you in a direction you might not have explored otherwise. Keep walking towards Divine Light and know that you deserve the love and healing that is ever-present in this precious moment.